Senior's Speech

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Senior's Speech

Postby Pip » Sat Jul 25, 2020 11:45 pm

A couple of us local retired types from the Senior Centre were asked to address a high school gathering put on by the PTA. As luck would have it, I was the only speaker to show up, so I had the stage to myself.

I talked about staying in school, getting good grades and all that usual bullshit; since I had plenty of time, because those other guys didn't show, I threw it open for questions.

The last one asked was, "Can you give us a couple of your life's philosophical beliefs?”

I said, "That's easy. Looking back over my 7+ decades, I believe I've spent close to 90% of my earnings on booze and women The rest I just wasted.”

I was then escorted out without getting to finish my two important guidelines to live by:

1) If it flies, floats, or fucks, it's cheaper to rent it!

2) If it's got tits or tires, you're gonna have problems with it.

I hope they invite me back next year so I can finish.

Kids need to know this stuff.
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Re: Senior's Speech

Postby VincentLupo » Sun Jul 26, 2020 1:54 am

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Re: Senior's Speech

Postby ctaulbee » Sun Jul 26, 2020 11:15 am


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Re: Senior's Speech

Postby dirk8837 » Sun Jul 26, 2020 4:27 pm

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